The True Meaning of Desire
by InuChanFan
Summary: Sasuke returns but has to go to jail before he can rejoin society. While there, he losses himself and it is to Sakura to save him. Rated M for future chapter, just incase. Reviews are always appreciated.
1. Awakening

**A/N- Hello all. So this is my first long Fanfiction that I'm posting. I'm actually quite nervous because not only is this my first real attempt at a fanfiction, but it is also my first real attempt at a lemon. Anyhoo, I just wanted to let you guys know. So if you think my writing is complete crap, please let me know (but please try and give advice if you think this is the case aswell). So, please read and relax, and let me know what you think when you're done. Thanks. oh, and I don't own Naruto, even though I wish I did.**

There is a big difference between wanting a person, and desiring a person. Sasuke did not just want her, he desired her. Sasuke desired the feel of her hair between his fingers while they toughed each other intimately. He desired the feel of her body pressed against his at night while he was trying to fall asleep. He desired the smell of flowers that naturally permeated from her body. He desired the passionately desperate touches that only she could make. He desired the look in those sea foam green eyes while they were having sex that told him that she loved him.

If he had just wanted her, he would only care about her body. The incredibly beautiful should that he had fallen in love with upon his return to Konoha wouldn't be half as special to him now as it is now if he only wanted her. He would have stayed a broken man if he had only wanted her; he would never have remembered how to feel. At least, that is what be told himself.

When Sasuke had finally returned to the village, he was locked up until he could prove that he was not a threat to the people. Though the Hokage had never met him personally, she knew enough about him to be wary of his abilities.

Sasuke did not mind his cell that much because he had prepared himself for some form of punishment before he returned home. He was just thankful that he was being fed regularly and that people were at least civil towards him. Unfortunately, being in prison allowed for lots of extra time to think about his circumstances.

As Kakashi-sensei had warned him, he had nothing to live for now that he had killed his brother. He had no family to return to that would congratulate him on finally succeeding in his life long mission. The closest thing to a family he had had since the death of his real one was his team, and none of them had visited him once since his return. He had no mission left to occupy his time and his thoughts. He had no plotting to do, no teams to assemble, no people left to kill. He had no purpose anymore.

As time went on, paranoia began to set in. He had begun to feel that even if he were released, he would never be trusted enough to be allowed to be a ninja. He would have to find some other occupation to make a living, and being a ninja was really the only thing he was truly good at. And even if he could sustain himself, he wouldn't be able to rebuild his clan as he had wanted because every woman he knew in the village before he left would be too old, dead, or too afraid of him to approach him.

If was because of these thoughts that Sasuke began to fall. He very much began to resemble the state he was in before the left Konoha all those years ago, only he was older, more muscular, more knowledged, and he had no hope to bring him up from his pit of despair.

He felt worse than pond scum. He felt that he was only taking up space, as if he was a burned on the world. He was breathing other peoples' air, eating their food, drinking their water. At least pond scum has purpose.

After a few months of being in prison, he had taken up a permanent position sitting down on the ground, rarely moving. His daily exercise consisted getting up to go to the bathroom, and using his arms and moth for eating. He slowly began to eat less and less until he only ate and drank what he needed to survive. The only sleep he got was five or ten minutes he would allow himself to doze. He was used to staying awake for long periods of time while he was on missions, but he was forcing himself to stay awake simply for the fact that his brain wasn't thinking properly and couldn't tell him to go to sleep. His mind would only be used for insulting himself, and the more he degraded himself, the more he began to hunch over his knees. _Pond scum does not need good posture_, he would tell himself. He would be so occupied insulting himself and feeling horrible that he no longer found time to see the world around him. He might as well have been blind and deaf because he was longer using any of his five senses.

It took the anbu guarding the prison about a month to realize his decayed state. When they reported Sasuke's condition to Tsunade, she had to go and make sure he was still breathing. From their description, it was only a matter of time before he completely keeled over.

Tsunade had figured that he would have a negative reaction to the world once he had finished his life long mission, but she never expected him to trap himself inside of his mind.

"How long has he been like this," she asked the anbu who was near her.

"We're not sure Hokage-sama. But he hasn't eaten a full ration of feed in one sitting for about three or four weeks now, and he hasn't moved from that spot in a couple of days" he responded.

"I see. Has he shown any sign of violence since his incarceration?"

"No ma'am. He has always been very docile."

"Very well," she said after a pause. "Release him and take him to the hospital immediately. Tell the nurse to start and IV on him. He needs some fluids and we need to get him eating again."

"Hai, Hokage-sama," the anbu said as she left.

Once she retuned to her office, Tsunade called Sakura in and informed her that Sasuke would be coming to the hospital and that she was to be taking care of him whilst he is there.

When the news that Sasuke had finally returned to Konoha reached her, Sakura was stunned. She had refused to visit him because she didn't feel like she was strong enough to face him after all these years. She knew that if she saw him in person again, her emotions would overtake her, and she would either break his skill with a single punch for being stupid enough to leave, or she would break down and cry at finally having him home again.

Tsunade knew of Sakura's past with the prisoner, but her rationale of the situation told her to pick Sakura regardless of her feelings towards Sasuke. She was the most qualified according to the Hokage. She was a medic-nin, so she knew how to take care of him. Also, she had learned straight for the Hokage, and was strong enough to beat Sasuke down and hold him should he ever try to escape. Plus, Sakura cared about all her patients, and a familiar face would probably help Sasuke out of the trance he seemed to have placed himself in.

Sakura groaned internally when Tsunade told her that she would be taking care of her ex-teammate, but she did not argue with the Hokage's decision. Sakura knew it was a waste of breath to try to argue with the Hokage when she had that look of determination on her. Sakura left the Hokage's office and went down to see her new patient.

She was visibly taken aback by his appearance. He looked nothing like the Sasuke-kun that she had once loved, and he barely resembled the man who once stood high above her on the ridge of tat rock laden crevice. He barely resembled a man; he looked more like a corpse.

Sakura could have seen every single bone in his body if she had chosen to get close enough to him to remove his hospital gown. His cheekbones and collarbones were clearly visible from across the room, as were the dark circles and large bags that had formed under his eyes. His eyes were open, but they had gone from cold and stubborn black eyes that they once were to vacant and empty eyes.

Sakura could not stand to see him like this. It was too difficult. How could she take care of him when she could barely be in the same room as him? She felt tears brimming at the corners of her eyes and knew she needed to collect herself. It was very unprofessional of her to get worked up in front of a patient.

She left the room for a few seconds. She decided that he needed to wake Sasuke up even if that meant using physical force. To her recollection, nobody had any really physical contact with him since his return other than transporting him to the hospital and changing him into a gown, neither of which is particular painful for him.

With newfound determination, Sakura walked back into Sasuke's room. She grabbed his arm out from under the sheet and blanket the nursed had placed over his lower half, and she began twisting it the same way a child would when they wanted to give their friend an Indian sunburn. She wanted a reaction, something, anything that would tell her that he was still in there somewhere. She began twisting his arm more and more, but he had no reaction to the pain. Sakura twisted his arm so far that his bones almost broke inside of it.

"_This isn't working_," she thought to herself.

"_Well what were you expecting_," her inner voice yelled at her. "_Sure, torture works great on thugs, but this is Uchiha Sasuke. He's been training his whole life, he even studied under Orochimaru and lived with on of the sanin's curses for years! Did you really expect a little arm twisting to wake him up?! I'm pretty sure he's been through way more pain in his life than that_."

"Well it was worth a shot," Sakura sighed aloud as she let go of his arm and set it back down gently on the bed. She walked across the room and sat down to think. She wanted to cry again but she pushed the tears back.

"_What would wake Sasuke up?_" she thought. "_Well pain doesn't work. Anything painful I can dish out is probably going to be 'just average' in comparison to some of the things he's probably felt throughout his life. Plus, I don't want to seriously hurt him; especially when he's like this. Maybe I need to go in the exact opposite direction. Maybe I just need to be kind to him. I'm pretty sure he hasn't had much of that since he left Konoha. But I don't think I can handle that. What happens if I can't control my emotions? I don't think I can handle that kind of pain again. But if it wakes him up, it's worth a shot_."

After a few more minutes of debating with herself, she got up and walked over to him again. She was nervous about her decision this time. Her hands were shaking and her heart was beating a little faster than usual

Sakura put her hands on the rail on the side of his bed, closed her eyes, and leaned over to the side of his face. She gently placed her lips just above the arch of his eyebrow, and pulled way after a quick second.

When she reopened her eyes, she looked at his face. His eyes were blinking rapidly and there was a tear running down his cheek. Sasuke was still in there, and Sakura knew how to reach in now.

**Alrighty, there's chapter one. I'm going to try and write chapter two tomorrow. But I have no idea how tomorrow's going to go, so I'm not making any promises.**


	2. Difficult Tasks To Overcome

**A/N: I am so sorry that it took me this long to post another chapter, and that this one is so much shorter. I just got back to school and it's a new semester. Plus, this whole week is going to be incredibly crazy. Tonight was the first night in a while where I have found time to actually work on this story. Well, I hope you guys are enjoying it. It's still making me nervous because I haven't ever attempted a story like this before. Anyhoo, just read and relax, and let me know what you guys think when you're done. Thanks.**

When Sakura got back to her apartment that evening, her head was spinning with confusion. Sure, she was happy to find a way to reach the person inside of the shell of a man that was once Sasuke, but how was she going to explain her necessary treatment to Tsunade? Sakura could try to hide her methods from the Hokage, but eventually, Tsunade would find out that Sakura was being affectionate towards a patient, and breaking several hospital rules in the process.

"_What if I just go and explain the treatment I want to use first thing tomorrow morning? Then, at least the Hokage could formally approve or disapprove. But what would I say to her? I can't just walk into her office and ask if I can kiss a patient that I have a history with on a daily basis. There is no way she would approve of that. She would most likely yell at me for suggesting such a thing. It's not even a legitimate form of treatment. It's just some crazy idea that I had that happened to work. Tsunade never goes for crazy methods of treatment. She always likes things to be by the book. I could avoid the issue altogether and pass his case off to another doctor, but his treatment probably wouldn't progress as much if the affection came from someone he didn't know. Plus, Hokage- sama asked me to work with him. She would definitely notice if someone else started caring for him. Ah! What am I going to do? I can't just let Sasuke go untreated."_

Exasperated from her inner conflict, Sakura went to the fridge to get something to eat in hopes that the food would bring back some of her energy. When she finally decided on something, she reheated it, went into the living room, sat down on her couch, and began to eat.

Though she tried to ignore it, she kept thinking about how cute Sasuke had looked in his hospital gown.

"Stop it, Sakura. He's your patient. He's sick. You can't think about those kinds of things when you have to go and be kind to him tomorrow" he brain told her.

"Yes, you can!" he inner voice yelled back. "In fact, it might actually help him recover faster if you're kindness is more genuine. Come one, keep thinking about him. You know you want to."

"So what if I want to, I can't. It's immoral. Moreover, I wouldn't be able to take care of him very well if I had genuine feelings for him. I wouldn't be able to make sound decisions that would be in the best interest of my patient."

"That's only and excuse doctors use when they don't want to operate on someone who they love or someone that they are related to. He is emotionally troubled. I don't think that means you're going to have to operate on him. It's not like you can fix an emotional problem by prodding his brain. Plus, you're going to have to get up close and personal with him, anyway. Despite your best efforts to avoid an emotional connection, your main form of treatment depends on it. No matter what you do, you're likely to rediscover your feelings for him."

"That's if I am still his doctor tomorrow"

"Come on. You know you are the best on for the job. You said it yourself just a second ago. Even Tsunade-sama said it. "

"I might be the best for him now, but what about in a few weeks when he starts to get better. I might not be the best doctor for him then. My judgment could be very clouded by my emotions"

"So you're willing to sacrifice a patients health for something that might happen. Wow. Good job, Sakura."

"Oh shut up," Sakura murmured aloud.

With that, she got up, cleaned up the remains of her dinner, and went to bed. She was still debating on what to do, but she needed to get some sleep. It was late and no matter what she decided, she still had to be up early to make her round at the hospital.

The next morning, after Sakura finished with her rounds, she went to see Sasuke. He was sitting in almost the exact same position in which she had left him the night before. He was sitting upright in the bed, and his lower body and his forearms were tucked beneath the sheets and blankets. The only difference today was that when she opened the door, his eyes blinked. Sakura thought she imagined it, but it almost looked as if he flinched at her presence.

Sakura wondered what it was that set him off. Was it her vibrant hair color, or her perfume that she had been wearing since her ninth birthday, (her mother had given it to her as a present).

"_It has to be something that someone else can duplicate_," she though disparagingly as she helplessly thought once again about passing on the case.

She walked over to the side of the bed, still unsure of what she should do. Her head was telling her to go and discuss the issue with Tsunade-sama, but her inner-self saying "to hell with it". She began to shake as the debates from the previous night began to swell within her.

She looked at him for reassurance, knowing that he would not be able to give any in his state. His eyes remained focused on his lap and distant, just as she had expected. He didn't seem to react even though her eyes were boring into the side of his face, and she honestly didn't expect him to. She looked down at her feet after a few seconds. She needed to gather courage.

After a few second, she looked up again, and leaned in. She pressed her lips to the exact same place that she had the night before.

Today, she saw no tears. She was expecting tears; she would have been able to handle tears. But today, she distinctly heard a choked, "Sakura" escape from his lips.

Sakura suddenly felt a coarse hand upon her wrist. She broke her eye contact for only a second to make sure that the object on her was in fact his hand, but when she looked back, he was looking at her, which only made her jump again.

"Thank you, Sakura," she said quietly with a pained expression on his face.

All Sakura would do was smile. She was practically beaming,

She leaned in as she had done before and kissed him on the cheek. Sasuke could feel her ever present smile on the side of his face.

"Are you hungry?" Sakura asked as she pulled away from him.

"Not really," he wanted to say, but he kept quiet. He nodded instead because he figured that he needed to get some form of nutrition in his body.

Sakura left, and got him some breakfast. When she returned, he didn't say anything, but he looked up. It was a small gesture, but it made a world of difference to Sakura. It was certainly profound enough to make her smile grow again.

Sasuke only ate some fruit, but Sakura figured it would take a while before he would be able to eat full meals again.

After he finished, Sakura cleared his place and left to tell Tsunade about Sasuke's miraculous progress.

**A/N: So... What did you think?**

**EDIT!- I didn't like how short this chapter was, so I went back and added a bit more. Plus, this gives me a good starting point for the next chapter.**


	3. Confessions and Difficult Decisions

**A/N: TADA! chapter three. wow, there is so much more of this that I want to write now that I've written this. HURRAY! sorry... I haven't been working on this piece very much, so I'm glad to finally have the desire to work on it some more again. Anyhoo, now that I have successfully rambled, please R&R.**

"My, Sasuke certainly has recovered quickly," Tsunade said. Tsunade was sitting at her desk with her elbow resting in between some scattered books and her hands folded in front of her mouth.

"Yes," Sakura replied. Though she was very happy about her patient's progress, she was so nervous that she could be seen shaking from across the room. The internal conversations from the previous night had only given her more things to worry about. She had been so scared of the events that could have happened today that Sakura hardly slept. Though she had been able to shake the nerve-racking feelings that she had felt, they were slowly creeping back into her.

"How long as he been speaking?"

"Not long. It hasn't been that long, though. But, all he did was say my name and thank me."

"Still that's impressive. And you got him to eat?"

"Yes. It was just some fruit, but it was the first thing he's eaten since he arrived at the hospital"

"Hmmm," Tsunade said with a small smile showing through her hands. "Well, carry on. I want update at the end of every day"

"Yes ma'am" Sakura said. She bowed and turned to leave. She could hardly believe that Tsunade hadn't made her reveal her secret form of treatment. Sakura wanted to pass out from relief into the nearest chair that she could fine. (Of course, it would probably be a good idea to leave the Hokage's office before doing so.)

Just as Sakura put her hand on the doorknob, Tsunade's voice came from across the room.

"How was it that you got him to come out of his trance like state?" Tsunade's hands had moved from in front of her mouth to resting in her lap. Sakura knew from years of studying under the Hokage that when she did this, she was no longer thinking deeply about the current situation, but was eagerly awaiting the response of the person in front of her. It was a position that Sakura never liked to the Tsunade take up; mainly because it meant that she would listen carefully and be very rational in whatever decision she made. Normally, this wouldn't be a problem. However, Sakura knew that her answer would most likely force the Hokage to severely punish her.

"W-Well," Sakura started. "A-At first, I thought that some form of physical pain would wake him up…b-but, when I tested this theory...h-he gave no response…. S-So, I-I thought about it. A-And the more I thought about it, t-the more I realized that… affection would probably shock him… and wake him up… and it did…"

Tsunade sat in silence. After a few seconds, which Sakura guessed she was using to digest the information that she had just stuttered out, she asked, "And what type of affection did you show him? Did you hug him, or… is it something else that is making you this nervous?"

Sakura couldn't answer her. Instead, she looked down at the floor in shame. Sakura was sure that her face was close the to color of her bright pink shirt, and it was.

"What… exactly…. Did you do, Sakura?" Tsunade asked as calmly as she could. Despite her efforts, her anger has managed to permeate itself into her words; which only made Sakura more nervous.

"I-I kissed him above his eyebrow" Sakura said quietly.

"How many times?" the Hokage asked her with just as much anger as she had asked the first time

"Twice. O-once last night…a-and once this morning… which is when he started speaking and eating again…"

At this, Tsunade sighed. She knew that she should suspend Sakura for breaking the hospital rules, but at the same time, she did not want to have to. Sakura was her favorite apprentice, and she considered her something of a little sister. She always found that because of this view, she never wanted to scold her apprentice unless she needed to learn from it. At this moment, it seemed as though Sakura had already learned from her mistakes. Sakura was definitely a nervous wreck.

Tsunade sighed and slumped deeper into her chair. "Sakura, you can't keep taking care of Sasuke if you show that kind of affection to him."

Sakura snapped her head back up to look her in the eyes. She hoped the pleading "oh no's" that were racing through her mind would come across in her eyes.

"D-Does this mean…?" Sakura trailed off.

"As of this moment, you are no longer responsible for the care of Uchiha Sasuke. Is that clear?" after a terse nod, Tsunade said, "good", and dismissed her pupil with another heavy sigh.

* * *

Sasuke knew something was wrong when Sakura never returned. _I must have annoyed her. I knew she would leave. No girl has ever stayed with me. Well, Karin did, but she was crazy. But Sakura used to be crazy, right? On some level? Maybe she'll come back. Karin did. But Sakura isn't Karin, and that is all in the past. I have no idea whether or not she is still crazy. I haven't seen her in years. She had to have grown out of it by now. That's why she's left me. Everybody leaves me eventually. I'm just pond scum. Nobody who is sane wants to have pond scum as a companion_. 

It only took a few hours for Sasuke to sink back into himself with his thoughts. He wanted Sakura to come back. There was something about her that made him want to be a better person. There was something about her that he was drawn to, something that he had always been drawn to. All Sasuke wanted was for Sakura to come back and sit by his side. He also wanted her to kiss him again, but he would never admit to thinking that.

Sasuke waited the whole afternoon looking at his door in hopes that Sakura would return, but she never did. Eventually the afternoon turned into night. After a few hours of staring aimlessly at the door, he shifted his head and let it hang as it had been before. A few nurses came in a checked his blood pressure and made sure he had enough fluids, but when they came in to check on him, he didn't even look up. He knew why they were there. They were there to do their job; they weren't there for him. They weren't there to visit the sad, pathetic pond scum that was Uchiha Sasuke.

Sasuke didn't sleep at all that night because he was back in his trance like state. Sleep didn't matter. When breakfast came around, he didn't even acknowledge the food. He wasn't hungry.

In his mind, Sasuke kept thinking about his current state. He knew that he was a hopeless case. He was hoping that when the nurses reported his progress, or in this case regression, to the Hokage, that she would find some way to make all his pain stop. Sasuke wasn't sure if that meant death, but he didn't want to wake up from his trance unless he could see Sakura. He didn't want to come back to reality unless everything was better again. Unless his family was real, unless people didn't hate him, unless he had a place where he could go and feel safe.

When the new doctor came in to check on Sasuke, he did the usual things that a doctor would do. He checked Sasuke's vitals, scribbled on a clipboard, and tried to convince him to eat. However, when the doctor realized that Sasuke was not going to respond to him, he got frustrated and left. This routine went on every night and morning for four days. At the end of the week, the new doctor reported Sasuke's condition to the Hokage.

The doctor informed Tsunade that Sasuke hadn't eaten since Sakura was looking after him. He also respectfully added that he believed that he was not capable of helping him.

At this, Tsunade sighed and dismissed him. She knew that she needed to bring Sakura back to work with Sasuke, but she still didn't want to break the rules. What kind of an example would that set. She was the Hokage.

It took the Hokage a whole night to decide what she was going to do.

**A/N: Alrighty, there you go. Please review and let me know what you think. **


	4. Reunions

**A/N: I have no idea how I finished this one so quickly. It's just astounding to me. Especially since I wrote the whole thing with my roommate and co. in the dorm room playing Spyro... and please dont ask why college kids are playing such an easy game. I'm still trying to figure that one out for myself. What's really funny is the fact that the game is actually challenging for them. Anyhoo, please enjoy this chapter. **

Since Sakura no longer had to care for Sasuke, she was avoiding the hospital and work altogether. She couldn't be near him right now. The fact that she was put in charge of his care was already very profound for her, but the fact that she had coaxed him to speak; something that he reportedly hadn't done in weeks, with just a few pecks had melted her heart. She didn't want to admit it, but she had fallen in love with Sasuke again.

"How did this happen" she asked herself.

"How could this not happen" her inner voice replied.

Sakura didn't want to start another long debate with her inner self, so she let it go. After Sasuke had left the village, Sakura had had time to get over her former love. She thought that after all those years that she would be cured; however, that obviously wasn't the case.

"When did I start feeling this way again?"

"I don't think you ever stopped feeling this way about him. I think you just suppressed your feelings for him."

"Good point. I did do that."

"Yeah…I know…" her inner voice trailed off.

Sakura wanted to go and see him, but she KNEW that she wouldn't be able to control herself if she went and saw him now. She decided that it would be much better for her to stay at home. So she had for almost a whole week. She only went out when she needed something at the store. The rest of the time she lazed about her home in her pajamas trying to come to terms with the emotions that were in her heart.

Every day Sakura had managed to keep herself occupied with her thoughts. Naruto and Sai were currently out on a mission with Ino, and since they were her only visitors, nobody was there to disturb her silence. She hadn't turned on her TV or read a single book since she had left the hospital a few days ago. Her apartment had been silent the whole time and she was actually beginning to prefer it that way. It gave her time to think about the things that happened earlier that week. However, it had also left her unprepared and with her guard down.

The doorbell suddenly rang, causing Sakura to jump. She recovered quickly, fortunately, and answered the door. It was a messenger from Tsunade asking Sakura to come in for a meeting. Sakura agreed thinking that the Hokage would just put her on a new case. Tsunade had often called Sakura in for assignment meetings, and Sakura had had a bit of a break. To be honest, she should have been expecting a call by now.

Sakura dismissed the messenger, showered, got dressed, and left for the meeting. When she walked into the Hokage's office, Tsunade was sitting at her desk, holding a piece of paper in her hands that Sakura assumed she was reading. There were some papers that were on scattered on her desk, and the Hokage looked like all she wanted to go was go to the bar and start sipping at some sake. Sakura had always believed that the Hokage got this expression when her work piled up, and it always seemed that no matter how much the Hokage read in a day, the stacks of papers would still continue to grow.

Sakura's entrance had been so quiet that Tsunade jumped when she finally realized that her pupil was in the room.

"Ah...Sakura...Good...You're here," she said sporadically as she attempted to organize some random pieces of paper.

"Yes, you called for me."

"Yes. I need you back on Uchiha Sasuke's case. It seems that after you left, he went back to the way he was. Only this time, he's completely refusing to eat. He hasn't had a thing since you got him to eat fruit a few days ago."

"Tsunade-sama. I can't take care of him. You know the method that I need to take to wake him up. It's not appropriate. I can't."

"You can and you will, Sakura. He is your charge now. I don't like it any more than you do, but sometimes the rules have to be broken. Even though I've never met him, I want him to rejoin this society, especially since he's been working towards that goal since he was a child. If it helps, think of that you're doing as a way to get him to accomplish his goal."

"Yes, ma'am." Sakura said.

"Very well. You may go."

"Yes, ma'am."

As Sakura exited her teacher's office, she attempted to compose herself. Sakura walked a few steps and around a corner so nobody could see her. Once she was sure that she was safe from all passerbies, Sakura leaned her back into the wall and gave a heavy sigh.

_I can't believe it. I just can't. _

Sakura stayed there for few moments to collect herself. Sakura was once again put in the position of having little time to make a very important decision. She wanted to go home and compose herself like she had been doing earlier that morning, but seeing as Sasuke hadn't eaten in DAYS, she also needed to tend to him. However, if she went to him directly, she would be a mess.

Sakura finally convinced herself that she hadn't been in much better condition when she was caring for him the first time, so she needed to and see him immediately. She composed herself as best as she could and walked down the halls that she had been wandering through since she was a teenager. She walked down the stairs and threw several doorways until she came to his room.

Sakura found it ironic that Sakura was currently in the room that seemed to be meant for her admirers. Lee, Naruto, and even some civilians whom she knew from around town had all been her patients in that room. It seemed that only her admirers were admitted into that room. However, the one man that she loved was now in there, and she was certain that he was the first person she had treated in there that had no affection for her.

Sakura slowly reached for the handle to the door. As she rested her hand there, she knew that all she wanted to do was run in and hug him. All emotions that ran through her the first time she had to walk through this door for him came back. However, this time she had a new feeling. She was nervous. She knew what he looked like this time and she was prepared for that. But she didn't know how bad his case was. She was nervous that this time, she wouldn't be able to help him at all.

Sakura pulled her hand away from the knob and put her hands on the door as if she were going to push down the wall. Luckily, there was a sense of gentleness in her motions that was not conducive for any form of destruction. She leaned her head against the door in-between her hands instead, and sighed again.

Once that was done, she felt that she was prepared as she was going to be, and walked in. Sasuke was sitting in his bed just as he had been almost a week ago. A blanket was pulled up to his waist, which was hiding his hands. He was sitting up in his bed, but his head was leaning down. His eyes were open, but they were unresponsive.

Sakura walked in a stood right beside him. She began to lean in, but before she could make any contact, she saw a tear stream down from his eye. The sight shocked her, so she backed up a bit. She had never known him to cry, and if he was crying, that meant that he wasn't fully unresponsive. What surprised her more was the fact that Sasuke then turned his head to look at her.

"Sakura-chan." He said.The pained look that his face held the first time he had spoken to her had returned. His eyes were alive with pain. They were filled with tears that threatened to spill, and all Sakura could to was melt before him.

"Oh, Sasuke," she said as reached her hand up and touched his rough cheek. She leaned in to touch her lips from his forehead. She felt something around her back, something that felt like his arms. She knew then that he was hugging her, never wanting to let his savior go.

"What am I going to do with you, Sasuke" Sakura said in a whispered, hushed tone.

Sakura's mind told her to pull away so she wouldn't hurt him. He was in a diminished state and she was known for her super strength; it was only natural that she wanted to know. However, her heart was telling her to hug him. So she did. She squeezed him never wanted to let go. They were both crying in each other's arms. This was a first for the both of them, but it felt so right.

**A/N: Alrighty, there ya go. I hope you enjoyed it. I'm working on the next one, but I highly doubt that I will get that posted by tomorrow. Espeically because tomorrow is Monday and I have to go to class and do HW and whatnot.**


	5. Released

**A/N: I have no idea how I got all of this written in one day. I am so tired! Anyway, please enjoy.**

Over the next few days, Sakura worked with Sasuke to get his appetite back up, and it was a difficult challenge for both of them. Sakura had to try to control her temper when dealing with Sasuke's ever present belief that he only had to do what he wanted to unless and elder told him otherwise. And Sasuke had to deal with Sakura's pushiness and the constant bouts of nausea from eating more than his stomach wanted to hold.

After a few weeks, Sasuke looked much better. His vitality was back, and though some of his bones were still visible, he had gone from looking completely emaciated to looking like a skinny teenager would. He had always been thin, so Sakura thought that he was almost to the weight that he should be at. He was even more talkative. Sasuke now spoke to Sakura every single day about various subjects. At first, he had only spoken when he needed to, but he was now willing to have a conversation if it was with the right person.

For about a week, Sakura had been feeling that Sasuke would be able to live by himself now. He was requesting food when he was hungry and he had mentioned several times that he wanted to go and practice. It seemed as though he had something to live for now, and she believed that he would not revert back into his previous state again. That afternoon, Sakura went to the Hokage to inform her of her opinion. The Hokage also agreed, and decided that she wanted to go and tell Sasuke herself.

When the Hokage stepped into the room, Sasuke was a little shocked. He knew who the woman was because he had met her a few times and Sakura often spoke about how great a teacher she was, but he never expected to meet with her under these conditions.

"Sasuke-kun," the Hokage said, "I'm here to inform you that you are now eligible to be released from the hospital. You may go home any time that you want."

Sasuke sat dumbfounded for a few moments. Once the initial shock about speaking with the Hokage in this manor passed, he became overwhelmed with the actual message that he was getting. He didn't believe that this would be happening. He thought that he still had a long way to go before he would be allowed back into society.

"Why?" he had to ask. _Don't you still consider me a threat? You said I wouldn't be released into society until I had proven that I wasn't going to a menace. How could I have proved that but sitting in jail and a hospital?_

"Why?" The Hokage had to laugh a little at the question. She thought that Sasuke would be thrilled to be released. "Well," she responded. "You haven't attacked anyone since your return. You've been peaceful and cooperative throughout these past few months, and since your health is back up to a stable place, I think it is time that you are released. Sakura also believes that there isn't much more we can do for you here. It's now time for you to go out into the world and figure things out for yourself."

Sasuke was shocked that Sakura felt this way and hadn't even mentioned it to him, but when he saw that she had looked down in embarrassment at the sound of her name, he knew that she felt badly about the situation, namely the Hokage coming to tell him this, so he let it go.

"Once I get back to training, would I be allowed to serve as a leaf-ninja again?"

"Right now, that is undecided. If we did allow you to come back, we would most likely start you at the bottom of the food chain and you would have to work your way back up again. However, with your skill, it wont be long for that to happen. Is there anything else that I can help you with?"

"Can I go home to my compound?"

"You can. But it will be very lonely there because you'll be the only one there. If you go back to the way you were, there wont be anyone there to help you again if you revert back to your previous state. You should probably live in town or with someone else for a bit before you go back."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Is there anything else"?

Sasuke shook his head, and the Hokage went back to her office, leaving Sasuke and Sakura alone together.

"Who do you think you're going to live with?" Sakura asked trying to brake some ice. She could tell that Sasuke was still mad at her for not letting him know about his impending release.

"Who said I _had _to live with anybody," he replied allowing some of his agitation to seep into his voice. "You heard her, I can live on my own for a time as long as I stay in town."

"Yea, but almost all of the apartments in town are currently being rented out. There used to be a good apartment building not too far from here, but a pipe burst a few months ago. Not only do the pipes have to be replaces, but all the water damage also has to be repaired. All the tenants have had to move elsewhere while everything is being fixed, so just about every spare apartment in town is being rented. I had Ino with me for a few weeks, but we started getting on each others nerves, so she moved back in with her parents…. I'm sure you can always bunk with Naruto for a bit."

"No way in hell and I staying with him."

"Why not?"

"I can't prove I'm reformed if he annoys me to the point where I kill him."

"So...what are you going to do?"

Sasuke looked away as if embarrassed. Sasuke had to gather his courage because the he was about to ask a question that could be taken two different ways. The first way being that she would just think that she was helping him out, and the second being that she would realize that underneath his tough guy image that he had managed to regain, he really just wanted to stay with her. "May I stay with you for a bit?" Sasuke asked quietly.

The room grew quiet. Sasuke was eagerly awaiting Sakura's reply, and Sakura was trying to control her head and heart long enough to give her answer.

"I guess it would make sense for you to live with me," Sakura rationalized aloud. "I know how to take care of you, I have a spare bedroom, and I wont charge you anything. So, sure."

"Thank you, Sakura" Sasuke replied with a small smile.

"But we probably shouldn't tell Tsunade-sama about this. She won't like it."

"Fine…. So when can I move in?"

"Later tonight. Do you have anything you need before you move in?"

"No. I don't really have anything to speak of other than the clothes and weapons I had with me when I came back to the village. I'm sure there are still some clothes that are mine back and the compound, but they probably wont fit me anymore."

"Alright. Well, then as soon I'm done with work, I'll check you out to leave and take you to my house."

"Alright."

Sakura then got up and went to make her rounds. As soon as she left the room, Sasuke's small smile had grown to a very big grin. He was so excited about this. In his satisfaction he leaned back in his bed and put his hands behind his head to bask in his accomplishment. Sasuke had been looking for an excuse to stay close to Sakura after he was released from the hospital, and now he had it. Not only was he going to be close to her, but he was also going to be living with her. In all of his plotting, he hadn't even thought about living with her. The closest to that he had come was for him to look for an empty apartment in her building so that they could become neighbors. If that failed, he could always drop in on her from time to time like he was sure Naruto did.

Sakua was also truly happy about it. All the apprehensive feelings that she had had about Sasuke when she was beginning to care for him had dissipated. Once she got him eating and talking, she began to appreciate him all over again. Now, the only bits of doubt that she felt now was about how in the world she was going to explain this to Naruto. It's not that Naruto didn't like Sasuke; he just wouldn't like the fact that Sasuke was living with Sakura. And neither would lee or Ino. Sakura figured that as soon as they got back from their missions they would all have something to say about this situation.

**A/N: Since there really isn't much of a cliff-hanger, I don't think I'll be working on this much. So if it takes a while for me to update again, I apologize in advance. **


	6. Moving Out

**A/N: I am so sorry that it took me this long to get this chapter written. In all honesty it has been a hectic few weeks. Anyway, please R&R**

There is a big difference between wanting a person, and desiring a person. Sasuke did not just want her, he desired her. Sasuke desired the feel of her hair between his fingers while they toughed each other intimately. He desired the feel of her body pressed against his at night while he was trying to fall asleep. He desired the smell of flowers that naturally permeated from her body. He desired the passionately desperate touches that only she could make. He desired the look in those sea foam green eyes while they were having sex that told him that she loved him.

If he had just wanted her, he would only care about her body. The incredibly beautiful should that he had fallen in love with upon his return to Konoha wouldn't be half as special to him now as it is now if he only wanted her. He would have stayed a broken man if he had only wanted her; he would never have remembered how to feel. At least, that is what be told himself.

He was sitting in her apartment on her couch as he often did in the afternoons. He was staring out her window, and after contemplating his current situation, came to the realization that he desired her. She had saved him, twice, she had given him hope, she had cared for him, and she still does.

They had been living together for a month, now. They had become better friends than they were before, and though Sasuke had originally thought he would be fine with being just friends, he was finally beginning to see that he wanted more. He wanted to show her how much he cared, but he also didn't want to scare her off. He needed to make subtle moves to show his affection.

Every day when he woke up, he looked into her room to watch her sleep. (On the rare occasion that she woke up while he was looking at her, he could claim that he's simply there to fight off her nightmares.) He would help her with breakfast and make sure that she got out of bed in time for work. He would wait around all day for her, and he would always help her with chores if she asked.

Sakura thought that these actions were simply an act of kindness; him showing his gratitude for letting him stay with her. Either that or he felt the need to do something because he was simply bored and restless while she was at work. Though she would never admit it, she was glad he helped. Not only did it show her that he cared, but it made it seem like they were in a relationship, instead of just living together temporarily.

It didn't take long for them to become dependent on each other. They did practically everything together. They always knew where the other was and what they were doing. They were like two peas in a pod, even when they were on opposite sides of Konoha. However, as time progressed, the apartment building that had been damaged was getting closer to being fixed. On the day the project was officially finished, hundreds of displaced tenants swarmed back to their old apartments.

Tsunade urged Sakura to convince Sasuke to move into the complex as soon as she heard the news. Though Tsunade was glad that he was progressing well, she thought that it was time that he moved out and proved he could be self-sufficient. Eventually, he would have to move out of Sakura's apartment anyway, and it wasn't as if they two would be very far apart if he moved into the apartment complex.

Sakura dreaded telling Sasuke what Tsunade had said. Sakura didn't mind having him in her home, but the Hokage's word is law, literally. Sasuke had to leave, no matter how much she didn't want him to.

Sakura decided that letting him know easily would be the best decision. She just needed to slip it into some casual conversation. But what was she going to say? _Thanks for washing the dishes, Sasuke, oh, and by the way, you have to move out._ That would go over really well.

Unfortunately, Sakura's plans failed her. When she walked into her apartment that afternoon, she became overridden with grief. Sasuke was sitting on the couch reading one of her books, looking completely innocent, and she just couldn't hide it from him. As soon as she saw him she froze.

Sasuke had been so enraptured in his book that he barely noticed her arrive. Also, due to her lack of movements, it took him even longer to notice her. When he finally did see her, he immediately noticed that she was paling and something was troubling her.

"What's wrong?" he asked trying to get to the bottom of her expression.

"I just spoke with Tsunade."

"And…."

"And she told me to tell you that you should consider moving out… immediately."

"I see," he said as he placed his book on the coffee table. This was going to be a serious conversation; he needed to pay attention to this.

"She believes that you have sufficiently recovered and are no longer in need of my care."

"Where does she want me to go?"

"She said it would probably be best if you move into that apartment building. It's only a few blocks from here."

"And what do you think?"

"Sasuke, my opinion doesn't really matter here. This is what the Hokage wants. I can't do anything about it," Sakura said, trying to conceal her emotional state.

"That's bull and you know it. Of course you have a say in this!"

"Well, since you're so excited about it, why don't you say what's really on your mind?"

"I don't want to go."

"I can tell that. But I can't let you stay."

Sasuke was almost completely defeated at this point. He wanted to confess to her the really reason why he didn't want to go. He wanted to tell her why he was also so caring. He wanted to finally let her know.

"I can't Sasuke. Maybe it is time that we just let this go."

"It sounds like your giving up on me"

"How does it sound like that? All I'm saying is that since we are being condemned by just about every authority figure that I hold dear, we might as well just let them have their way."

Sasuke didn't respond. He stood up from the couch, walked over to doorway that led to the bedrooms, and leaned against the doorframe. Sasuke seemed almost to be in a state of panic. It didn't seem like he was going to be able to deal with the fact that he had to move out. But really, he was on the verge of breaking down and telling Sakura his feeling, hoping that if she knew, she would let him stay,

Regardless of his state of being, Sakura had to know his reasoning. "Why do you want to stay here?" she asked. "I'm hardly ever here, you're bored half the time, usually more than that, I'm not a good cook, and…"

"Because I love you," he whispered.

"W-What was that?" Sakura asked tentatively.

** A/N: See, here is the part where I know you guys are going to be upset. Not only did I make you wait two weeks for this, but I'm also going to be extremely evil and make you wait for the next chapter. (And by now, you should know what is in that chapter). Oh, and the next chapter is the last, FYI. So, I hope you guys enjoyed it, and please leave reviews to let me know what you thought. **


	7. Together

**A/N: TADA! The final chapter. I would have posted it this morning, but something was wrong with my internet. So, I hope you guys enjoy it. **

Sasuke turned around and slowly began to walk towards her, matching every sentence with a step. "I love you, Sakura…. Please, don't turn me away… I need you… more than you know… please…. Let me stay"

"Sasuke, I can't... You need to live on your own again... Y-You need to be free from this apartment... You need to forge a life of your own."

"BUT I DON'T WANT THAT! … I just want to stay here… with you… please… let me stay…"

By now, he was standing right in front of her. Without another word, he began to lower himself down until their lips met. He lowered his hungry, desperate lips to her unprepared ones. He could tell that she was surprised, maybe even a little scared (especially because he was just yelling at her), but when she started kissing him back, he knew she was all right.

"I love you, too" Sakura said when they pulled away. "I love you so much."

"Thank God", he said breathlessly before their lips collided again.

Their was passion between them that neither one of them knew how to deal with. They were both new at this sort of thing. Sakura had never had a lover in her village; there wasn't anyone there that she ever particularly wanted in that way. And Sasuke, because he was either always training with Orochimaru or on the run, had never had an opportunity to seek out company that didn't completely annoy him (as Karin did).

Their kissing quickly turned to something more. They began tearing at each others' shirts. Articles of clothing were quickly hitting the floor. Sasuke soon realized that the living room was probably not the best setting for these kind of actions, so he picked up his topless partner and carried her into her room.

He took her to her bed and sat her down at the edge of it. Sasuke leaned them down, and the two of them worked their way to the middle of Sakura's bead, trying desperately not to break the contact between them.

As soon as they were situated, Sasuke broke away form Sakura's lips, and began moving down the side of her neck. At first, Sakura was disappointed, but she was happy when she realized where his mouth was going.

He kissed all the way down to the top of her bra cup. Sasuke wanted to get rid of this offending attire, but he didn't know how. Seeing as Sakura was lying on her back, and Sasuke had had no experience in removing bras before, he leaned up and whispered, "could you help me" in her ear.

In an instant, Sakura sat up just enough to undo her bra and throw in away. With that gone, Sasuke returned his attention to her chest. She kissed and sucked each breast, wanting to give equal attention to them both. And when his mouth was on one, his hand was on the other.

Sakura was panting. Sasuke's ministrations were making her world spin. She wanted him to touch her so badly, but she was afraid to ask. She decided to lift her hips up to his instead of asking. When their lower bodies met, she felt something hard between his legs.

The brush of her hips made Sasuke want more, as if he never wanted them to be separated from their intimate position. He ground his hips into hers as he continued to work on her chest. As the connection increased, so did the passion. Sakura's deep breathing turned into moaning. The combination of Sakura's approval and the grinding made Sasuke feel like he would die if he wasn't inside of her soon. Sakura also needed more than just the outer contact that he had been providing.

"Sa-Sasuke… please… I don't think I can take… much more of this" Sakura said quietly.

Sasuke instantly began removing her pants and underwear, as well as his own. They were soon stark naked in front of each other. Sakura had always thought that she would be shy and blush when this finally happened to her, but she was comfortable being naked in front of him. Their love was so great that it didn't matter what type of body type she had. Just the fact that she was herself, and he was himself, overpowered the embarrassing feelings that they expected to be there.

Sakura wanted to touch him. She hadn't done anything to him other than kiss him and hold him. He had been able to play with her chest and kiss down the side of her neck while she was rendered still. Now, she wanted to play with something of his.

She began by lightly putting her hands on his chest, and allowing her hand to snake down his stomach to his cock. Her touches convinced him that she was going to do something to him that he would enjoy, so he reluctanty broke their intimate contact. They both gasped when she grabbed onto him. Sakura was surprised at how he was both silky and strong, and gave him a testing squeeze. Sasuke was just surprised at how good it felt to have her touch him there. She wanted him to roll onto his back so she could feel like she was in control, but at the same time, she didn't want to make him move.

Sasuke groaned at the action in approval. Her touch increased his need for her. He needed to be inside of her, now more than ever, but decided to deal with the agony, and let her have some fun instead.

Sakura began pumping him slowly. She was nervous and completely unsure of herself. The only thing that was letting her know that she was doing the right thing was his groaning because he was no long capable of talking, let alone telling her how he felt. Sasuke started thrusting into her hand in hopes of finding completion, and Sakura sought to match his thrusts. She began pumping faster and harder, and Sasuke looked like he was about to explode.

Sasuke was so close to extasy, but realized that this wasn't how he wanted their first time to be. He wanted them to come together, especially because it was both of their first times. They would never have a second chance at this, so he wanted them to be together when it finally did happen. He stopped moving his hips suddenly, grabbed her hand and whispered at her to stop as well. Sakura had thought she had done something wrong, but then he smiled, and she knew everything was all right.

Without another word, Sasuke went and positioned himself at her entrance. He looked at her in questioning manor, and Sakura knew what he wanted. She just nodded in response, and Sasuke slowly began to slide in. When he reached her barrier, he captured her lips. He was hoping that the kiss would distract her from the pain he knew she felt, but it didn't. He still felt her tense when he broke her wall. He even felt a tear stream down the side of her face and land on the back side of his hand.

Sasuke moved to kiss away her tears. When she began to move a little, he slowly pushed in and out of her. He knew that she should be recovering quickly. Unfortunately, Sasuke soon realized that he wasn't going to be able to last much longer. Sakura's sheathe was tight and he was already so close when they began. He needed to get her near her edge soon; otherwise, this wouldn't be a truly enjoyable night for her. He decided that he had to do something, so he reached his hand down to her clit and began massaging it, and he began to suck on her breasts again.

In a matter of minutes, Sakura and Sasuke were both at the edge. They were moaning so loud that they were sure the entire building could have heard them, but they didn't care. They were finally together. After years of waiting, they finally had each other, and they were never letting go.

Sakura came first, but as soon as her inner muscles began to spasm and clamp down on him, he followed. Sasuke collapsed on top of her, but he kept most of his weight on his elbows.

As they caught their breath, they rolled onto their sides facing each other, always in eachothers' arms.

"I love you. I wish you knew how much I truly love you" Sasuke whispered before falling asleep.

Sakura smiled in return. "However much you think you love me, I promise you that I love you more," she whispered to him before leaning over to kiss the spot above his eyebrow. That was her spot, and no one else could claim it. And he was hers, just as she was his. No one else could claim him, and no one else could ever claim her.

"I never wanted turn you away. Of course I'll let you stay," she said before drifting off to sleep in his arms.

** A/N: Alrighty. There ya go. I hope you guys enjoyed this lovely emotional rollercoaster. As always, reviews are always appreciated.**


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